


Smallclothes

by doomtwinkie (shinysparks)



Category: Sleepy Hollow (TV)
Genre: Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Drabble, F/M, I've had waaaaay too much caffeine, Ichabbie Valentine, No seriously it's only 100 words, What Have I Done, What Was I Thinking?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-14
Updated: 2018-04-02
Packaged: 2019-03-18 14:34:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 2,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13683657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinysparks/pseuds/doomtwinkie
Summary: Abbie gives Ichabod a little Valentine's Day present. Written for Ichabbie Valentines.





	1. Present

Crane pulled the shiny, red bag apart, and plucked a skimpy, translucent pink negligee from its tissue-paper and glitter-filled contents. He gawked at it.

“Oh!” He said, blushing hard, holding it up in front of him by its tiny straps, “smallclothes.”  
“Smallclothes,” Abbie said, grinning.

He paused for a moment, staring at the wonderfully naughty piece of lingerie, then at Abbie, then back to the lingerie.

“I’m... not certain this will fit me, Leftenant,” he said, with a tiny squeak, ears going pink.

Abbie smirked at him.

“Who says it’s meant to fit _you_ , Crane?” She asked with a wink.


	2. Countertop

Crane eyed the negligee, which was in shreds on the floor.

“A pity,” he said to Abbie, as they lay on the countertop, tired and sweaty, “that lace was exquisite.”  
“Eh, it was cheap,” Abbie said with a sigh, “I really didn’t expect to be wearing it long enough for you to even notice the lace.”  
“We didn’t quite make it to the bed, did we?”  
“No.”  
“And now the countertops are filthy,” he said, “they certainly aren’t fit for eating on!”

Abbie kissed him gently, then chuckled.

“Well, I suppose that depends on what you plan on _eating_ , Crane.”


	3. Whipped Cream

He had managed britches.

Crane stood in front of the fridge, shoving whatever food he could find into his mouth. He was starving beyond belief; but then, he’d barely had a break in hours. His body ached and his stomach growled loudly as he grabbed the can of whipped cream from the door. Before he could squirt any into his mouth, Abbie appeared and took the can.

“Pfft. All you had to do is ask, Crane,” Abbie said, grabbing the waistband of his britches and smirking seductively at him as she pulled him towards the bedroom, whipped cream in tow...


	4. Siri

Crane sat naked on the toilet seat, iPhone in hand. He was no longer hungry, having eaten his fill of whipped cream, strawberries and... _other things._ Things that had made him blush at the very memory of them (and he had an amazing memory, too.)

He wanted to make more memories; however, there were things he needed to know before round four began.

“Are you almost done, Crane?” Abbie called to him in a sing-song voice.  
“Almost, Treasure,” he called back, before turning to his iPhone. 

“Pray tell, Miss Siri, how exactly does one ride a _surfboard?_ ” He asked quietly...


	5. Succumb

“So,” Crane panted as Abbie grinded herself on him, “the smallclothes were not the real present, then?”  
“Nope,” Abbie said, “the present was just to fuck each other until one of us couldn’t walk straight. Course, with you already staggering...”  
“I wasn’t staggering.”  
“You crashed into the bed, Crane.”  
“I tripped over the whipped cream can!” He wheezed, “I won’t be the first to succumb... oh good god!”

Abbie smirked at him, going down on him hard and watching as he began to twitch, and moan, and smile, and drool a little.

“That... that doesn’t count,” he muttered moments later...


	6. One for one

His ever-twitching fingers were wrapped tightly around her bare thighs, holding her up, pressing her into the wall as he thrust into her over, and over again. She breathed hard, almost in perfect sync with the rhythmic movement of his hips. Waves of bliss washed over her, each wave pushing her closer, and closer, to the edge...

...And then she toppled over it.

Abbie cried out as he made the Earth shatter for her, reality fading out briefly in a blast of tight muscles and bright, blinding light.

“One for one, Leftenant,” he breathed, a playful grin on his face...


	7. Pizza

She sat straddled on the kitchen table, breathing hard with each kiss he planted on her inner thigh. He worked his way up slowly, his beard tickling her soft skin. He slid his tongue out eagerly.

Abbie tried to hold herself together as he edged ever closer. She couldn’t give up so easily... or so quickly...

“DING!”

Crane stiffened at the sound of the doorbell, sliding his tongue back in his mouth.

“Are you expecting guests, Leftenant?”  
“Pizza’s here,” Abbie replied, “care to get the door?”

He raised an eyebrow, grinning.

“This is something that will require pants, won’t it?”


	8. The Full Moon

Crane couldn’t find his pants.

His now-antique smallclothes had disappeared, and he’d been forced to wrap a towel around his nakedness... a towel that had loosened itself when he’d reached up to take the pizzas... a towel that had just about fallen off of him, exposing more bare skin than he expected.

Loud shrieking followed. Most of it from Crane.

“You tip the delivery girl?” Abbie asked once he’d closed the door.

“She may have gotten more than a tip,” Crane replied nervously, fingers wiggling, “poor thing was so bewildered, she kept babbling about there being a full moon tonight...”


	9. Stamina

Abbie watched as Crane wolfed down his seventh piece of bacon pineapple pizza, chewing fast and swallowing, before eyeing the last remaining piece as hungrily as he’d eyed the first. She stared at his bare stomach, wondering where his skinny little ass put it all; wondering how he worked... how he _continued..._

“How are you even doing this, Crane?” She asked, “I always thought guys... you know, that there were limits on how many times...”

He reached over and planted a sweet, gentle kiss on her lips.

“I can do anything in the presence of a goddess,” he said, smiling.


	10. Exaltation

“Show me how you worship a goddess, Crane.”

He recalled with perfect clarity her words, as the countertop turned into an altar on which he pledged his devotion. He lowered himself onto her, _into_ her, thrusting strong and steady. She replied to his adoration with pleasured moans; yet, she did not relent. She held strong against his continuous supplication, spurring him on, daring him to give her more than just his body.

He gasped, exploding inside her, watching as she lit up like the sun from his offering.

The goddess wanted his eternal devotion, and he gave her his soul.


	11. Eidetic

Scents of soap, of jasmine and rose; falling water tap, tap, tapping on the shower floor. A soft moan. A goddess in front of him. A goddess in his mind, in his memory, overwhelming him, overloading him...

Fingers wiggling and eyes shut, the memory of how he’d given himself to her overtook him, quieting the chaos. He thought of her, how he’d moved within her, how he’d worshipped her. He felt his body respond, growing ever tighter by the moment.

Muscles twitched, breaths quickened, and once again, the memory and essence of his goddess flooded his mind, body and soul...


	12. Two to One

Abbie thought he’d lost his damn mind.

He stood in front of her, naked, aroused, grinning. She eyed his wiggling fingers, his quick breaths, his twitchy muscles, and his low moans. She shook her head.

“Um, Crane?”

No reply.

“Crane?” She sighed, “CRANE!”

He opened his eyes, only for them to go wide as he took in her equally naked form. Muscles tightening, balance lost, he grunted as his feet flew out from under him. He hit the shower floor with a loud boom.

Abbie bent down, chuckling, as he spilled himself down the drain.

“Two to one,” she said.


	13. Tie game

“It should not count!” He’d cried as Abbie ordered him into the tub.

Ten minutes! Ten straight minutes of bitching. She sighed, hopping into the tub after him, nuzzling her head against his chest and hoping it would be the end.

Hoping he’d be _quiet._

She then felt his hand slide across her thigh gently; fingers sinking between her legs, sinking inside her. She moaned softly as he slid his forefinger playfully over her bean, sending shockwaves of bliss through her body.

She breathed heavy, looking up at him, her eyes glazed.

“We’ll be tied soon, Leftenant,” he said, smirking.


	14. Bruise

“My rear is a catastrophe,” Said Crane, eyeing his butt bruise in the mirror. He winced, touching it, “I thought the hot bath would’ve helped.”  
“It probably would have,” Abbie said, staring at his bum, “but then someone got a little frisky with his fingers.”  
“And then you climbed on top of me and we flooded the bathroom,” he said, grinning, “at least we’re tied now.”  
“No, we’re not.”

Crane spun around, mouth dropping open. Abbie laughed, grabbing onto him and pulling him close.

“You’ll have to do much better if you want to tie this game, Crane,” she said.


	15. Game Over

His bruise hurt with every thrust of his hips, and his muscles cried out from fatigue, but he ignored them.

He was on his knees this time, rhythmically thrusting into her; bedpost hitting the wall, keeping time. Her legs rested on his shoulders. New angles. New positions. New ways to make her moan...

He bit his lip, holding back, holding on, riding the waves of energy coursing through him. He could’ve held on, could’ve tied the game, but he realized he no longer cared about that.

He cared only for her, her needs, her joy.

He didn’t matter.

She did.


	16. Eyes

His eyes gave it all away.

Abbie stared at him, at his flushed face, at an expression of ecstasy and pain. He bit his lip, holding himself back, as he thrust deeper within her. He’d wanted to tie the game - and he’d been off to a good start. But the longer she stared into his eyes, the more she realized he no longer cared about that.

He looked at her with longing, with joy, with a desire to please her, to worship her. And in his eyes, he divulged a simple truth:

That he loved her more than life itself.


	17. Darkness to Light

He was in love with her, mind, body and soul.

He realized it then, pushing in, pushing her so close to the edge of ecstasy he could feel her leg muscles start to tighten around him. His entire life had been spent in darkness, in war, in pain, in strife; it wasn’t until the first moment he laid eyes on Abbie, that he’d finally seen the light.

She was the reason he existed, that he drew breath; and in that moment, he gave her his all, and their entire world exploded into bright light.

“I love you, Abbie,” he whispered.


	18. One Last Time

“You sure you’re up for another round?”

She watched as he stood above her, barely balancing himself on the bed and looking entirely worse for wear. He yawned heavily, and repeatedly.

“I’m fine...” He yawned again, eyeing the naughty photo on his phone, “now, does my leg go here, or do I... WHOA!”

Legs twisted and balance lost, he landed on the rug below the bed with a loud _WHUMP!_

“Crane! You okay?!” Abbie yelled.  
“I’m...” he yawned again, “fine... fine...”

He was snoring moments later. 

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Crane,” Abbie said, chuckling, as she tossed a blanket over him.


	19. The End

“Crane? You alive?” Abbie called, leaning her head over the edge of the bed.   
“Mrf,” he muttered, face down on the rug, before turning his head towards her, “I huuuuuurt everywhere, Leftenant.”  
“Well, we _did_ have a lot of sex, Crane,” she said, before smirking, “should last us until _next_ Valentine’s day, though.”

Crane’s head shot up off the floor, and he stared at her, shocked, horrified, pleading. 

Abbie burst out laughing.

“When I am rested, there shall be hell to pay,” he said with a wink.  
“I’ll look forward to it,” she said, kissing him sweetly on the lips.


	20. Epilogue: One Year Later

Crane laid the tiny baby in her crib, relieved that she was finally asleep. He tucked her in, gushing with pride. _His_ daughter. His daughter with his goddess; beautiful like her mother, with her father’s eyes (and penchant for shrieking incessantly when perturbed.)

“She out?” Abbie whispered.  
“Yes, thankfully.”  
“How long you think we have?”  
“If her usual diaper-soiling, shrieking pattern keeps? Thirty-two minutes.”

Abbie stared at Crane. Crane stared at Abbie. Abbie pulled off her nightgown, exposing a translucent pink negligee underneath. Crane grinned.

“I’ll be on the couch,” she said, winking.  
“I’ll get the whipped cream...” he replied.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed it! :D
> 
>  **Update:** [There's a sequel now!](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14555013) WHATEVER WILL ABBIE AND ICHABOD DO WHEN THE POWER GOES OUT DURING A SEVERE SPRING STORM? _*wink wink nod nod nudge nudge*_


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